The Legend of Zanta

I am currently sitting in my basement attempting to write. It's suppose to be cool down here, but it isn't... cooler yes, but incredibly muggy, even with the lights all off. It's been like this for most of the week. Everything is sticking to me, I am on the fence of a migraine... about to fall off that fence. I could use a drink right now, but save getting dehydrated, I have decided to stick to my tepid water. The last time I had any type of alcoholic beverage was this past Wednesday evening. An evening spent with both brand new and comfortable old friends.

After an hour waiting for a table on the rooftop patio of Hemingways, M decided enough was enough and made her way to the front patio scoring us a table. We were a bit disappointed that we wouldn't be sitting on the rooftop, but fun conversation, wine and a character named Zanta Claus soon turned out disappointment to sheer entertainment! Do you know who Zanta is?

The first time I saw Zanta Claus was the 2005 St. Patrick Day parade at Yonge/Bloor. Zanta was following the procession. He was shirtless and only wearing a pair of shorts, boots and a Santa hat. At first I thought he was part of the parade, but quickly realized he may be otherwise when he would continually stop, do push ups and pose, not to mention the windchill was minus twenty something. Listening to other people's conversations I quickly learned that he was a regular spectacle at all these events.

Suddenly I was seeing Zanta everywhere I went. City Hall, Queen Street, Danforth, Annex and even the subway. He always had the same attire of shorts, boots and the Santa hat. One of my girls even pointed out that he appeared to have no chest hair, was clean shaven and was quite buff. Why would he be otherwise seeing as he most likely does hundreds of push-ups a day. Wednesday night we had front row seats to push up's on a taxi cab, photo's with tourist and multiple acts of fitness. Zanta also took the time to flirt with any cute 20 year old girl that would give him the time of day.

There are many stories revolving around the legend of Zanta. Some say he was a construction working falling from a few floors up, causing brain damage, hence is outrageous personality. I wonder if we could use the same reasoning for Liberace, Rosanne Barr or Jerry Springer. Others say he may be bi-polar and not taking his medication, while another story suggests he started the whole Zanta character up to entertain his daughter during a custody trial. Only Zanta knows the real story.

After an hour of entertainment, I realized that this guy is famous. I must be doing something wrong, not to mention he has his own myspace and website!

If you are intrigued and would like to find out more, check out some of these links:

torontozanta.ca
http://molarradio.ca/?p=43
http://ohpunk.blogspot.com/2006/07/zanta-claus-is-coming-to-town.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zanta