shebytches

New Issue of Shebytches.com is alive!!!

2009-07-27T14:05:00.000-04:00

Hey all the new issue is up! Check it out at www.shebytches.com

Carolina's Bytch An Extinct Breed

Right now I am fighting to stay awake. My recent bout with insomnia has me feeling exhausted. Sure it's beneficial, no sleeping means more time to write. Not sleeping also allows me to think, too much. I should be using my brain power to come up with devious plans on how to take over the world, or write, or finish off my second book proposal, rather than do that, the last two nights I have been trying to figure out why I have this awful pit in my stomach, again.

Heather Wood Happily ever after… or not.

Earlier this year two University of Pennsylvania researchers, Betsey Stevenson and Justin Wolfers, released a paper called "The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness".

Romy Shiller Double Standard?

When I'm good I'm very, very good but when I'm bad I'm better.
- Mae West

Maybe this is a booty call. Do females do that? Do I care? I think many women are worried about seeming desperate or as being perceived as a slut. Do males worry about those things? Dictionary.com defines double standard as "[a] set of principles permitting greater opportunity or liberty to one than to another, especially the granting of greater sexual freedom to men than to women."

Viki Ackland Stick to your DO list

I have always been prone to writing pro and con lists when undecided about things that my head is quite decided about.

The new issue of shebytches.com is now up!

2009-05-25T15:02:00.001-04:00

Hey Everyone! The new issue of Shebytches is alive. Please swing on over to www.shebytches.com to check it out. Below is what is hot off the presses!

GUEST WRITER

Oneal Walters - Poetry - Picture of Love, Untitled, Can’t Find Love In Arguing (The Age Begins)

WHAT'S NEW

Carolina's - Bytch Two Journeys - I am about to start two very different journeys; one involves a possible move and the other a four-legged ten-year-old fur ball. Both are going to be tough and likely expensive, but one won't stop the other from happening or vice versa.

Cindyloohoo So long fat girl! - After a lifetime of being overweight (and many years of being "morbidly obese"), I decided last year to get rid of this massive chip on my shoulder (and off my ass) and have gastric bypass surgery. Nine months later and I feel great.

Nancy Drew - "On Living Bravely" - I was at Moonbean Café the other day with a friend whose life is going really well. She just moved out of her parent’s house after living with them for three years while in school for naturopathic medicine. It was a grueling three years.

Heather Wood - I've read this story before - Much as I like to claim that I am only 29, I was actually born in the "Swinging Sixties"—that progressive era when it was perfectly acceptable to fire a woman just for being pregnant.

Pixie Says - Stand Up for Judy Blume -- and, while I have your attention, ask the Japanese government to ban video-game rape simulators - When I was 13, I was hauled up before the headmistress at my school because some of my friends' parents had found them reading my copy of Judy Blume's legendary novel Forever (with the *important* pages dog-eared, of course).

Romy Shiller - People seem to abhor ‘difference’ - I was so mad when Adam Lambert didn’t win American Idol (2009). It is just a TV show but it says a hell of a lot. He wears nail polish, eyeliner, some people say he is gay and he is called by the show a “glam rocker.”

Video Games, Fantasy and a Call to Feminist Programmers

2009-05-09T06:12:00.003-04:00

So my previous post about the Equality Now campaign to ban rape-simulator video games in Japan provoked some discussion on Facebook. One of my friends countered that fantasy is a space that should not be policed: as a feminist, I agree with him, which got me thinking that...

1) the problem is not the rape fantasy per se (OK, it is a problem for me as a rape survivor but whatev), but that it's not really a fantasy, is it? It's a reality: men can and do rape women (and men) every day, all around the world, and it's (almost) socially and legally acceptable. Whether as a weapon of war, or a tool of social control, rape - including child rape - is not some unexplored fantasy but an expression of patriarchy

2) the other problem, then, is that the video game perpetuates the normativisation of rape. Of course, there's no direct connection between playing a game/watching a film and enacting what you've done/seen therein, but all cultural texts do contribute to shaping our understanding of cultural norms.

My friend agreed these points, but argued that censorship wasn't the way to go. I agree, of course: mass sterilisation and/or castration, followed by forcible re-education, would be far preferable.

Kidding! But can you imagine if there were a video game that allowed - nay, encouraged - women to do so? Say, based on the film Baise-Moi, or on Angela Carter's novel The Passion of New Eve. How much fun would that be! How many copies would they sell! Or even a game based on freakin' Thelma and Louise - with the opportunity to rewrite the ending, naturally.

Because that, I guess, is the alternative to censorship, to do what Carter did so brilliantly and re-write, re-vision, re-make in the image of your own fantasy. So this is a call to feminist programmers and hackers out there: given that it was possible to create a patch that stripped Lara Croft and one that simulated hardcore sex in GTF, how about a patch that re-writes RapeLay so that when the male POV character chases one of the sisters, the other (or the mother) stabs him or, in a more realistic and actually more satisfying conclusion, calls the cops and gets him arrested (preferably followed by the player's console getting locked for a day in real life). "Success", ie: winning the game, could be patched as NOT raping the children.

And for those who think this would never fly in the big-bucks gaming world, take heart from this article, headlined: "The naked truth: sex doesn't sell games."

Stand Up for Judy Blume -- and, while I have your attention, ask the Japanese government to ban video-game rape simulators

2009-05-07T06:19:00.005-04:00

When I was 13, I was hauled up before the headmistress at my school because some of my friends' parents had found them reading my copy of Judy Blume's legendary novel Forever (with the *important* pages dog-eared, of course). My mum was called in as well. Events didn't quite transpire as I suspected, however: both my mum and the headmistress, a free-thinking radical and one of my all-time heroes, defended my right to read whatever I wanted, spoke in favour of Blume's socio-sexual education (and support for contraception) and were generally right-on. They did advise me, however, to tell my friends not to get caught.

So Judy B. and freedom of expression, especially around sex and sexuality, have always seemed like natural allies to me. What better way to celebrate the first Mother's Day of the Obama era (that is, under a president who supports women's freedom to choose and the right to sexual health education for all, as witness his appointment of Kathleen Sebelius as Health and Human Services secretary) than with an email shout-out from La Blume via Planned Parenthood, asking supporters to:

...Say thanks. Say thanks this Mother's Day with a gift that honors her courage by making a donation to Planned Parenthood in her name.

The message was full of support for mothering as the hard work it is -- and as a decision not to be undertaken lightly.

As well as a wave of warm, inspired donations to an organisation that is often the ONLY provider of contraception, advice and abortion in certain states in the US, as well as a tireless provider of women's sexual health around the world, the message was followed by a meanspirited backlash totally out of step with this political and social moment. Only desperation could prompt hate mail to a beloved children's author! But PP is taking the threat to freedom of expression seriously, and asking all its allies and supporters (and everyone who thrilled to Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret) to do the same.

You can send Blume a note of support, which is worth it for the thrill of writing to Judy!!! Blume!!!, and show her the support that she showed to all of us as children and adolescents. As PP write:

Judy Blume has done so much for so many of us. The wisdom, compassion, and understanding that shine through her writing have helped countless young people grow up and grow strong.

That's why we were so shocked at the response to her latest act of compassion. When Judy honored Planned Parenthood by writing a special Mother's Day message on our behalf, the reaction from anti-choice extremists was swift and vicious. They flooded her office with harassing phone calls and hate mail, including death threats.

Nobody, absolutely nobody, should be forced to endure these kinds of attacks. Help us make sure that Judy knows that there are millions of us who support her and admire her courage. Fill out the form below to send your note of support to Judy Blume.

Please share this with all your friends, family, colleagues, acquaintances, lovers, random people at the grocery store... We need to support our people!

And in more news from the scary side, a fabulous video game called RapeLay. Some strong-stomached activist at Women's Action has documented the game so you don't have to, and also offers details of Japanese law concerning the depiction of sexual violence -- and the need for those laws to change. Campaign action details and model letters are available at the bottom of the article. Equality Now, like Planned Parenthood, are doing difficult work speaking truth to power -- please support them however you can (EN and Joss Whedon have a mutual lovefest going on, if that inspires you to join up!)

The New issue is up!

2009-03-30T10:28:00.001-04:00

We are back from hiatus and will resume publishing the last Monday of every month :)

We are also always looking for new women writers for the site. If you have edge and have something to say, get in touch with us :)

WHAT'S NEW

Pixie Says Worth Less = Worthless

That's not what I believe. Of course. But it's hard not to draw that conclusion from today's newspapers in the UK.

snadzmatazz Today I almost quit.

Viki Ackland Online vs Reality

It is funny how some people have their own personalities online, which appear to be the opposite of their real lives.

Worth Less = Worthless

2009-03-16T17:58:00.003-04:00

That's not what I believe. Of course. But it's hard not to draw that conclusion from today's newspapers in the UK. Skipping over the whole Josef Fritzl case because I can't even think about it without throwing up, let's focus on two main UK stories, back to back in the Guardian:

Rape complaints were not classified as crimes by police
Equal pay is a step too far in recession, says rights body

It's been widely reported in here, and I'm sure it's the same in Canada, that women are being disproportionately affected by the global recession. Women make up the largest percentage of part-time, casual and agency workers, who have the least job security (as well as earning the least and having zero benefits). So rather than recognise the fact and do something to rebalance the economy, the so-called Equalities and Human Rights Commission has had the brilliant insight that this is just not the time to impose equal pay on businesses.

That's right: in a recession, women should nakedly continue to receive less money for equal work. No mention that the extra cash could come off the fat bonuses of the bosses, which is where the biggest inequity lies. The EHRC is doing what governments have long done: making believe that the people threatened by equal rights are men in low-waged jobs who will (the threat runs) see their pay packets cut in order to "compensate" women workers (who stand to lose £360, 000 over a working life, on average, not to mention lower pensions and benefits). Divide and conquer at its nastiest, to stop workers coming together to campaign for each others' rights.

As Amelia Gentlewoman writes, the right to be paid an equal wage has been turned into gender warfare, which shows up some pernicious social values:

Anything perceived to be a caring role, looking after children and old people, has always been rewarded less well than the predominantly male jobs, partly because the skills women bring to the work are regarded as innate, rather than qualities they need to be specifically rewarded for

. So the three 'C's (cooking, cleaning, caring) are seen as something women do 'naturally', an argument that could surely apply just as doltishly to male soldiers [men 'naturally' want to kill things].

That argument from 'nature' is a dangerous slope for lots of reasons, not least because women tend to be subject to it more than men (and non-white people more than white people). It implies that women's work is worth less because it's just "what they do." It's a small leap from there to thinking of women as worthless. And presuming that 'naturally' they're nothing but bodies, fucking machines. Kate Alley writes in her letter to the Guardian that as a passenger in London taxis, she was

repeatedly told I could pay for fares "in kind", asked how far I could spread my legs - this was a bewilderingly regular question - and so on.

I don't think it's a huge leap from women's work is worth less to women are worth nothing but what comes 'naturally'.

It's part of the same cultural blindness that equal pay doesn't exist as a matter of course (despite the fact that, as Kate Pickett and Richard Wilkinson demonstrate in their new book The Spirit Level, equal societies "almost always" do better) and that police treat rape reports as "crime-related incidents." In fact, the police in the UK go so far as to treat the woman making the complaint as a criminal in some cases, harassing her, making accusations about her lifestyle choices. Because getting fucked is just what women do.

It's natural.

Right?

Lipstik Indie March Issue is Alive!

2009-03-02T13:02:00.000-05:00

Hey all, the new issue of Lipstik Indie (www.lipstikindie.com) is up and alive! Our featured artist for the the month of March is the all girl band Fidgit!

Also included in the new issue are:

Bands - The Black Atlantic, (reviewed by Viki Ackland)

Books - Reproduce and Revolt edited by Josh MacPhee and Favianna Rodriguez (reviewed by Carolina Smart), Nothing To Lose by Steve Vernon (reviewed by Carolina Smart)

DIY/Indie Online Stores - Pretty Raccon Clothing (reviewed by Laura Roberts)

Graphic Novel - Bad Habits by Cristy C. Road (reviewed by Cathy Petch)

Movies - Dreamscape by Daniel J. Fox (reviewed by Cathy Petch)

Zines - Above Ground Press (reviewed by Devon Jones)

January 26, 2009, New issue of Lipstik Indie

2009-01-26T13:45:00.000-05:00

Hey all! The new issue of Lipstik Indie is now online and it is the biggest issue yet! www.lipstikindie.com

This months issue's main feature is the Redemption Roadshow by Weston Ochse. Other reviews included in this issue are:

Bands - So Many Wizards

Books - From Clarissa by Mike Page and Night Has Fallen by Shawn Parker

Online Comics - A Softer Wold and Tiny Ghosts

Online Store - Cry Wolf

Music - Curious

We are also welcoming our latest reviewer Laura Roberts and she will be reviewing e-Zines and online stores.

Laura is the author of the sex column "V for Vixen" at Hour.ca, as well as the Editor-in-Chief of Black Heart Magazine (blackheartmagazine.com). She currently lives in Montreal and is at work on her first novel, which may or may not be entitled Blowjobs for the Soul.

What if Edison gave up?

2009-01-23T19:17:00.002-05:00

The last two weeks have been the busiest two weeks I've experienced in a very long time. They have also been the most stressful. You see, I'm a writer, trying to get freelance work to help support myself while writing my books. The last two weeks have been researching, updating and sending out my resume. I made a promise to myself to send a few out every day and I have been. Due to our economy I am worried that I won't find enough work to keep me afloat. Stress has led to depression, depression led to a panic attack.

I keep everything to myself that relates to money matters. Pride never allows me to ask for help, plus in a crunch I always figure out a way. I will this time as well, I know I will. Part of what I've been struggling with is I know I am going to have to start temping to help pay for rent and bills. Temping is brilliant, you work when and where you want, allowing me time to still write at the rate I have been, but pride is keeping me from doing it. This has been stressing me out so much that I recently asked a friend, who is in the industry, if I could talk to him, find out how he got to the place he is now, a published author and editor who does both full time and lives comfortably doing so. It was the best four hours I've spent in a long time.

It just so happens that two years ago my friend was in the same spot I am now. Struggling to make ends me, looking for work, trying to get a book done and depressed as hell. Many of his friends did not understanding his desire and passion to live out his dream and pride so strong he didn't want to take part time jobs to support himself, but worst of all friends continually telling him that he would never succeed as a writer, simply because they didn't. When he finished telling me this, he asked, 'sound familiar?' What he had to say to me didn't end there.

He asked me what I had been doing all year. I told him and though harsh, his words to me were the kick in the ass I needed. He told me that I'm a talented writer, but I'm not trying hard enough. He gave me a list of things to do and words of wisdom on how to succeed. I've written everything he said to me out and pasted it beside my computer. I bolded and capitalized two very important things he said to me. One is at the top of my list, the other at the bottom:

STOP WORRYING ABOUT LETTING OTHERS DOWN, WORRY ABOUT LETTING YOURSELF DOWN

and

EAT, SLEEP, BREATH WHAT YOU WRITE!!! STICK TO YOUR GOALS AND NEVER LET THE NEGATIVE VOICES STOP YOU.

As I said it was a four hour conversation. At first I walked away taking in everything he had said to me and tryed to make sense of it all. Sadly, later in the day, I had someone throw incredibly negative words at me, I came home, had a melt down and then almost threw in the towel. I didn't, because these words kept resonating in my head over and over again. What if Thomas Edison gave up? People told him over and over again that his ideas were foolish, that he was setting himself up for a huge failure and disappointment. What if Edison listened to all those negative naysayers... well, you'd likely still be reading by candle light. Ya, I know, sounds a little extreme, but that man is the reason for many of todays innovations and proof that following ones dreams are not foolish.

Am I hungry enough, determined enough? I am! I've dreamed of this my entire life and in the past have let too many negative, bitter people interfere with my progress. I'm not going to allow that any longer. Today I started from scratch, I have a schedule and list beside me and I'm not only sticking to that, I am sticking to my dreams, naysayers be damned.

New issue is alive!!!

2009-01-11T13:30:00.001-05:00

The new issue of shebytches.com is up and alive!!!

We are also looking for new writers for the website. If you are interested in writing for an all women run website, please contact me at carolina@shebytches.com.

No More Suicides

2008-11-15T16:31:00.002-05:00

I've written about the RAGE I feel about young people, especially young women, killing themselves before on Shebytches, almost exactly two years ago. Then I was writing about teen chess player Jessie Gilbert, who threw herself to her death from a hotel window, but this time it's personal.

I lost a friend. Perhaps worse, a potential friend, one of those rare, brilliant people who can connect to others in a single conversation, who is honest, open, funny even after years in the corporate world. Who is loved by people who've only emailed with her. Who was full of ideas and plans to make them come about, who believed fiercely in making a difference, and offered amazing support to others who also looked at the world differently.

What I feel is probably too raw to be writing about, but that's what blogging allows. Raw pain. Raw anger. Raw fear -- fear that I could be next, or any one of my friends who has also experienced depression, rejection, financial burdens, physical illness, and an uncaring world that says "Well, that's your problem. Toughen up." Especially if you're female, or queer, or of colour, you've got to be tougher than tough, brighter than bright, take everything they throw at you in your stride.

So I'm angry. Not at my friend, but at all the people (myself included) who didn't break the bounds of propriety and 'civilised' behaviour to help her. Like many people who have experienced depression, she was skilled at managing and disguising it, although this took the form of withdrawing from the world and any contact. But, frankly, who wouldn't? Depression is a badge of shame, especially for a professional adult -- it's characterised as irrational, irresponsible, somehow dirty -- and somehow avoidable. As if exercise/diet/sleep/sense could cancel it out.

I'm angry because I feel that the world has let her down, the world that she was promised if she worked hard (she did), achieved academically and socially, was polite, friendly, a 'good girl', stood up for herself, did everything she was supposed to -- to inherit what? A damaged society where women are still not taken seriously (women in full-time work stand to earn £369,000 less than men in the same jobs, it was reported today, and in part-time work the gap is even bigger). A blinkered society where oppression gets passed around in whispers. Where a male boss with wandering hands is par for the course. Where a writer of colour is told to write something "more Brick Lane" because no-one will read/believe a book about a woman of colour going to Cambridge. Where the US president could use feminism to justify bombing Afghanistan "back to the stone age."

These are some of the things we talked about, in lively tones of setting the world to rights, when we met -- a first conversation that went on for hours and promised several more, as well as book exchanges, movie screenings, gossip... the things that make up a life. It makes me furious that someone so clear-eyed, so talented, so vivid and with so much to offer found nowhere she could reach out for help.

So: no more suicides. What can we do -- as friends, as mothers, daughters, fellow workers? As ourselves, survivors of suicidal attempts or ideations? Where do we start to change the culture around depression? How do we talk about suicide honestly, instead of covering it over in shame? Where is the charity on the scale of breast cancer research that offers acute counselling and care to people struggling with depression?

Some places to start, if you need someone to talk to and have come across this blog. Please, please ask for help:

Samaritans (UK)
Befrienders (Worldwide)

If you're looking for counselling that is sensitive to issues around gender and sexuality, including body image, abuse, sexual identity and transitioning, you can contact:

WCREC (Toronto)
The Pink Practice (London)

Check me out...

2008-10-30T20:43:00.000-04:00

http://www.shamelessmag.com/blog/2008/10/carolina-smart-queen-of-shebytches/#more

Oh my... Oh my...

2008-04-16T10:34:00.002-04:00

I have to apologize.. We have sucked at posting lately. I need to make a bigger effort here!!!! So a few updates:

We are now publishing Shebytches every other week. This way you get a larger chunk per issue!!!
I am writing my book of short stories. The nice weather is making it hard to sit still though....
My fav new food blog is Happy Herbivore.
To keep up to date on me... personally and my writing I have my own blog now.
I am in love with Cuba and can't wait to go back. You can see all my pics from my vacation on my facebook.

So there!

This is bullshit....

2008-02-06T11:46:00.001-05:00

My favourite saying lately is either...'this is bullshit' or 'that's bullshit'. I find it works for pretty much every situation I've been in lately. Try it. It seems to make every situation ok. And once you say it... you kinda realized things really aren't that bad.

Generally when most things go wrong in life... it pretty much is bullshit. And once you realized that, things will start to look up again.

I think I might have that put on a tee shirt....

the countdown....

2007-12-19T21:01:00.001-05:00

19 hours till freedom

the addiction begins........

2007-11-22T12:56:00.000-05:00

oh gawd! the addiction begins........

last night there was this horrible movie on... a made for TV from the 90's with Kim Delany....... she was a wheelchair bound famous author, whose first book became the obsession of a serial killer........ he was caught..... new book comes out..... new serial killer... yada yada yada....... I actually watched it to the end because I needed to know who did it! What's even worse is the person I was watching it with only started watching 20 minutes before the movie ended and also had to see how it ended...........

Then this morning........ I turned breakfast television on as soon as I got up to 'check the weather'

I'm afraid to go home tonight........... there might be only static and voices calling to me...................

this is going to become a problem... isn't it............

I am clearly weak..

2007-11-20T22:40:00.000-05:00

cable TV egaads!

Thank you Mr. and Mrs. Simopolous

2007-11-19T19:04:00.000-05:00

Mr. and Mrs. Simopolous gave me their extra TV.... you guys are awesome! The Dr. helped me retrieve it from their place... you are beyond awesome!

Now what the hell do I do with it??? I don't have a DVD player yet. I have an old laptop I can use in the meantime to watch DVD's but can't find my video cable. Hopefully I can come up with a solution for that. Then I can at least watch movies. That was the entire point of a TV for me. I don't want cable... the only channel I miss is the Scream Network... but unfortunatetly I can't just order that channel... bah humbug... so.........

I stare at it... no it's not actually on when I do this... but I still stare at it...

play it again....

2007-11-02T13:30:00.000-04:00

I'm fasting again....... the last one was in April. I would have nomally done another one in August but life was nuts....

I am having mad food cravings and am peeing ALOT!!!!!!!! I am thinking about just moving into the bathroom..........

My favourite new website

2007-10-30T22:00:00.001-04:00

http://www.angryalien.com/

The next Master Cleanse Fast

2007-10-18T14:03:00.001-04:00

hey all, from November 1 to 10 we are going to do our next Master Cleanse and blog about it. If you are interested let us know. We are going to blog over at http://thechurchofthin.blogspot.com/. If you want to join in the group blog for the cleanse email me @ shebytches@gmail.com

Getting there...

2007-09-25T22:39:00.000-04:00

Wow! September has been insane!!!!! October isn't looking any less crazy. Summarizing what happened in September.

I moved!!! Ok... that is a huge story in itself.... Was suppose to move Sept 1, but couldn't because the former tenants left the place in such a disgusting state that I couldn't move till painting and the floors were done. I finally moved on the 6th. I am blessed to have such amazing friends. Carole showed up with a buggy full of accessories and cleaning supplies. My bathroom was spotless!!! What an amazing woman she is! Sarrah and David showed up ready to move furniture. Anna moved my stuff from her apartment to mine. Prior to that my parents and brother BJ helped me move my stuff to the building. Because my apartment wasn't ready I had to put it in a spare apartment till then. Once I was moved in I had boxes to unpack and furniture to assemble. Dr. B built my computer desk for me. Otherwise... I'd be typing this on the floor!

There is still lots to be done. I still have to put up my curtain rods, and actually buy curtains. Ikea here I come. I still have some painting and fixing to do, the walls are bare and need pictures and art, but it looks FAB as is. It's comfy, and it screams me! I also have that red couch I've wanted all my life!!!

Home Sweet Home!

That's not where it ends. I sold my house. It was remarkable. One day on the market, 3 offers and got above asking! I was both shocked and very happy with the end results. Now I need to start looking for a condo!

Next up is Sarrah and David's Buck and Doe. One major thing of the list is I FINALLY got my dress!!! Sarrah's Mother in Law is also very relieved!

October.... people come on. It's the month of Halloween!!! And Sarrah and David's wedding!

this cat has a weird obsession with me.....

2007-08-27T20:30:00.000-04:00

Anna's male cat Limey... has this weird obsession with me. It started with him constantly staring at me, jumping up as soon as I am my laptop and insisting on laying across my keyboard. It seems we have progressed from that to him emulating what I'm doing on my key board (ie pushing the enter pad and then looking at me saying ha!), to waking me up at three in the morning.

For the past few weeks, he has become more aggressive. It started with crawling into bed with me in the evening and simply purring and staring at me. Occasionally he would put his bum in my face. About a week and a half ago, he started laying down with me, purring and tapping my face to get my attention. I would rub his belly for a while and then this appeared to satisfy him and he would wander off... Now he does this plus is waking me up at three in the morning.

Limey will start off by loudly purring, staring and slobbering on you. When that doesn't work he will softly touch your face with his paw, rub his face against yours or as he started doing last night, licking my nose. When that doesn't work the tapping on the face gets a bit more aggressive with him flexing his claws. I try so incredibly hard to pretend I am still asleep, but... it doesn't work.. I end up waking up in a fit of giggles. Of course, once this happens I am duty bound to rub his belly for no less than an half hour. After that he falls asleep.

The way I see it... if Limey was a man, he would be a sexoholic. We call him the cat whore.. and lately he has been living up to his name.

A day off from the world...

2007-08-22T12:22:00.000-04:00

Today I took a day off from the world... I had a hellish day yesterday...

It started when I got off the bus at Bathurst/Bloor and was once again the victim to the verbal barrage of a homeless man... I wouldn't give him money and as I walked away he started to call me names I haven't heard in a while. Me with my temper lashed back at him. Once again no one standing around did anything... rather stared at the situation as if it was entertainment. Playing in traffic would have been a better risk....

Not sure if there was something in the air...

Work wasn't any better.. people snapping at me for no reason... I'd had enough by lunch time. But being the stubborn one... stuck around till the end of the day.

Mid afternoon the oddities of my day continued. I received an email from someone I haven't heard from in over a year and a half... out of the blue... hey how are you?

Then the nightmares started last night. One of them I vividly remember.... a la Night of the Living Dead. Everyone I know is trapped in a farmhouse... as we are about to be attacked with zombies. I am sitting in corner observing what is going on. The chaos, confusion, tears, fighting. No one is organized and everyone wants to be the boss. Finally I've had enough and stand up and start pushing people over and barking out orders.

YOU find bottles, kerosene and rags
YOU go find weapons and amo
YOU start boarding up the doors and window
YOU do this... YOU do that...

Everyone is standing and staring at me. Then at the top of my lungs I yell NOW!!! Everyone starts to move, doing everything I say. Then a car pulls up as darkness approaches... they are being chased by zombies. No one wants to let them in. I can't let helpless people be killed so I rush out and help them get into the house and to safety... then I wake up.

I have nightmares like this once in a while. They are meant as messages. This one is screaming I need to take back control of my life, start being brave again. Or as Anna put it last night... need to start growing back my mane... somewhere along the line... it got singed...

A Jon Cusack Moment

2007-08-20T19:43:00.000-04:00

Last night I watched two Jon Cusack movies, Better off Dead and Grosse Point Blank. I use to have a mad crush on him, but what girl didn't? That's not the point I'm working towards though. It seems that every Jon Cusack movie I watch has a hidden question. And it always seems to be the same one. Jon's character usually falls for someone and he usually has trouble telling that person how he really feels. Then eventually goes over board.

Have you ever completely connected with someone, but you don't say anything, because you aren't sure if the other person has these feelings as well or afraid the answer might not be what you want to hear? It seems that when we feel that type of connection for someone and if there is even a small amount of uncertainty, we become little turtles and hide in our shells.

There is a scene in the movie where Jon is too terrified to do something and is about to take the easy way out, but one of his friends tells him to 'Buck up little buddy, buck up.' Why is it so hard for us to buck up... and so easy to retreat to our shells? The problem is we all sit around waiting for the other person to buck up. Eventually someone has too... what happens when you are impatient, like me. I hate waiting games, hate puzzles, hate not knowing. I start to squirm. Yet am too stubborn to be the one to buck up.

Mental Day

2007-08-14T18:34:00.000-04:00

Today I didn't go to work. I had a bit of a rough night. Not sleeping and getting down on myself about a million things. I do that sometimes. I woke up this morning exhausted and knew I needed a day to sit and stay quiet. The quieter I got the more I couldn't quiet my mind. All I could hear was grandma Betty's voice, over and over saying, in her thick scottish accent 'Why do you care what they think. It's not important.' Then laughing her loving, the world is ok laugh. It didn't matter how bad things were, she always had that laugh.

I wish I could laugh right now. I also wish I could give that old broad a hug. I crave the smell of chantilly and cookies. I miss her! If I got into a funk she could always pull me out.

colour me confused....

2007-08-10T18:06:00.001-04:00

these last two days have been.... odd... am confused... and now pissed off....

~big changes
~someone did something to me today that was completely disrespectful... the least they could have done was wait till I wasn't around... I don't understand why it was necessary.
~the more that has been happening the more I need to leave this city... nothing is keeping me here... especially after what happened the last two days. if given a good reason I would stay...
~words and actions.... mixed messages...confusion... I don't get the humans....
~I have to start using my head... and not my heart.... and listen to my gut.... I will stay out of trouble that way...
~am tired of being taken advantage of....

What is wrong with the people in this city?

2007-08-08T23:35:00.000-04:00

What is wrong with the people in this city?

Really! What the hell is wrong with people. This morning I stopped to help a woman in distress. She was biking along and somehow her shoelace got caught in her pedal and gears... when this happened she wiped out and got tangled up in her bike. At least half a dozen men saw what happened and walked right by her. They looked at her and did NOTHING! Similarily on my birthday I was being harrassed verbally and followed my a homeless man. Twice I had to yell at him to leave me alone or I was calling the cops and NO ONE, asked if I need help. I had to finally go into a coffee shop and was about to call the police when I then got into it with a man in the shop who said to me 'oh by the poor guy a coffee already'. I had it out with him as well. He assumed I was the problem. The people around me looked at me like I was the crazy one. I'm afraid to know what would have happened had he assaulted me. Am sure no one would have helped then either.

I am so tired of the shitty men of this city. The way they treat women is disgusting. I know there are a few good ones out there... but considering how many bad ones!!! And not that men are going to be any less shitty in another city, It is time for my next big change. I need to move out of this city. I've been thinking about it for a while and I think the time is getting near. Nothing is keeping me here. I do have some realestate to sell and some debt to pay off once the sale is complete. And it seems the Gods are sending me messages left right and centre as my job may also become obsolete soon. The time is near for me to make my big break. I am strongly considering either Montreal or New York City. I've had a strong desire to live in both places. As for Montreal, my cousin lives there so I wouldn't be completely on my own. Living in New York would be a dream for me. So once I have all my financial stuff taken care of and after my trip to Scotland, I need to start working on a plan to move in 2008.

As you can tell it's been a rough morning. It has been since I woke this morning. I have something weighing on my that I need to deal with. I need to speak up about something, but am having a hard time. Unless I get angry I can't express what I feel and am having issues with that right now. I know I need to just come out and say what I want to say but to avoid disappointment or possible hurt... I keep it bottled up. I let it eat away at me and put on that 'oh everything is just fine' face. It seems the only person on the face of the earth that get's past that is Anna... She keeps telling me to just do something or say something and get it over with and deal. I think it's time to take the really big leap of faith. Hopefully I land on my feet... and not my ass.

I fell down.......

2007-06-28T10:47:00.001-04:00

I realized last night, everything is going to be ok. I fell down, had noodle soup on the hottest day of the year and drank lychee martini's. (In case you are wondering, I fell down first). My girl friend laughed at me when I gell down, but then again... I laughed at myself. Something happened at that very moment though. That moment made me realize, I'm going to be ok.

Oh wait, maybe I should back it up a bit. It's been a while since I've blogged, so am sure many of you are wondering what the hell I meant by that. Recently there has been a major life change happening for me... I'm not ready to talk about just yet. Stay tuned as down the road I will. I'm not ill or anything like that, but due to this change there is has been upheaval, emotional moments, panic, stress and so on. Through all of this... no matter how unbearable, there have been my girlfriends waiting to hug me, wipe my tears, feed me, give me shelter and hand me booze.

It's true what they say about finding out who your real friends are. When crisis happens, you see who is by your side and who runs away. I've always been a loner, choosing to sit in front of my computer writing rather than hang out with friends... or so I would make it seem. Making this change has not only made me come to terms with the things I was doing, it has also made me realize just how big my circle of friends is and I can tell you, it's quite massive.

No one even flinched when I asked for help. No one, I have friends and relatives coming out of the woodwork. I can't even explain to you how grateful I am for each and every one of them. My biggest piece of advice to all the women reading this. Hold all of your girlfriends dear to you close, trust me, they are the ones that are going to be ready to help you and if necessary do battle. They are the ones you need to ensure you keep for life.

I love each and everyone of you!!!

changes...

2007-06-11T18:55:00.000-04:00

changes....

new friend

old friend

no longer waiting for the big drop

fates at work

third time the charm

the river is flowing my way

new decisions

just a coincidence

excitement and purpose

new chance

different choice

deeper meaning

is this a beginning

or a conclusion

always an adventure

I feel ill!!!!!!!!!!

2007-05-31T20:41:00.000-04:00

I found this on Sarah's blog. I started reading it thinking it was about the TB case. It was worse.. much worse. Here is the link to the story. We need to make this stop.

http://www.canada.com/montrealgazette/news/story.html?id=0010ae9f-d017-444f-8bb8-3b69dedf7528

Write or email them and voice out. I am. How can the do this to animals. As soon as I saw it was Beagles, I started to well up. I grew up with Beagles and they are the sweetest, gentle, loveable dogs. They have big brown eyes and floppy ears and all they want to do is love you. How can anyone harm a beagle or any other creature. Shame on Air Canada!!!!!

Write them now!

Air Canada - Customer Relations
PO Box 64239,
5512 4th Street, NW
Calgary, AB, Canada
T2K 6J0

or email them

https://aircanadacustomercare-en.custhelp.com/cgi-bin/aircanadacustomercare_en.cfg/php/enduser/ask.php?p_sid=yyWLDTCi

that explains alot...

2007-05-31T20:31:00.000-04:00

I just realized it's a full moon out tonight... that just helped explain a tonne.... I get it now!

is anyone home...

2007-05-20T15:37:00.000-04:00

sometimes I wonder. I've been a bad blogger, but it's been very busy! Am writing my ass off... when am I not.

am struggling with the humans again it seems. I tire of them. a few rules that will help you get along with me

don't be inconsiderate
don't stand me up. I have a cell phone call me if you aren't showing up
don't take me for granted
if you aren't interested I'd rather you tell me rather than ignore me
don't be rude, it's not acceptable
don't disrespect me, you have to earn my respect and you have to work to keep it

see why I am having issues with the humans...

sigh

2007-05-06T22:35:00.000-04:00

one huge disappointment after another it seems...

time to get on with it... except I seem to be stuck in neutral...

can someone give me a shove?

Another crazy weekend ahead

2007-05-05T11:05:00.000-04:00

I have way too many errands to run today... haircut.. groceries... on and on... I have to clean this place! three story proposals adn a grant to get done... we need to clone me!!!

Not to mention.. I think my dog might be my soul mate... if I could get people to look at me the way he does... at least he's blonde!

Awesome blog

2007-04-27T20:10:00.001-04:00

Check out this girl! She rocks!!! sarah 811

hello is anyone home

2007-04-24T11:54:00.000-04:00

Wow, I just realized that I haven't posted in a really long time... here's an update

I hate doing my taxes, spend most our recent gorgeous Saturday, doing them... blah
All men are pricks
We need to banish all TV stations!
A great anti-man movie, The Wickerman (one with Nicolas Cage)
I want to see Hot Fuzz
The Beaches has too many people with SUV strollers
Raw Food kicks major ass, except right now I'm bloated and gassey, but I think my body is just adjusting
I'm turning into a health fanatic
All men are pricks... did I mention that?
I learned how to properly start seeds and have become the sprouting queen!
Zombie MOVIES RULE!

where have I gone

2007-04-06T13:57:00.000-04:00

not far... not to worry am still here... am fasting and have been posting here and also working on the 30 Day Raw Challenge Blog... no worries, I haven't forgotten about this one :)

Fast, Fast, Faster!

2007-04-01T12:16:00.000-04:00

It's that time again! I'm on day one of my 3rd Detox/Fast. You can check out all the details here (we've started a group blog)!

Two more sleeps!

2007-03-30T22:53:00.000-04:00

Two more sleeps till I start my third Master Cleanse! I am very, very excited. Better than Xmas, then after that the 30 day Raw Challenge!!!

There are two group blogs for both, they can be found here:

the church of t.h.i.n
the 30 day raw challenge

I went and got another jug of maple syrup from Carrot and now have all the stuff I need. Funnily enough as we were approaching carrot, cops came out of no where, apparently after some guy with a gun. When I saw the cops running and one with his hand on his holstered gun, Janis and I decided to stay exactly where we were and wait till all the chaos stopped. It just figured the takedown was outside Carrot!

30 Day Raw Challenge

2007-03-24T11:51:00.003-04:00

I'm about to do something wild and crazy!!! For the entire month of May I am going to go 100% raw. This is a huge thing for me, because I love my cooked food! For every day I am raw I am putting a dollar in a jar and at the end of the challenge am going to pick a charity and donate it. (haven't figured out the charity yet).

Would anyone else like to join in on the challenge. Or at least cheer me on. I know May seems like a long ways a way, but really it is only a month. For April I am doing a detox/fast and figured May was the perfect month to do the challenge. It also gives me time to find a used dehydrator (fyi anyone in toronto selling one or know someone who is???) and how to make my own sprouts. (can someone suggest a good book for that)

anyone... anyone... bueller... bueller... and May is great time to start playing hookey

xo c

Joy Thompson Interview

2007-03-21T20:18:00.001-04:00

Hey all, were back with a a brand spanking new podcast! Check out our interview with Toronto musician Joy Thompson!

Link to interview is right here!

You can here the song 'Becoming' (that was played at the beginning of the interview on Joy's myspace. http://www.myspace.com/joythompsonmusic

To breed or not to breed... that is the question...

2007-03-15T13:10:00.001-04:00

is it something in the air or water.... was winter really that cold?

is this contagious... if it is I want to a vaccine to prevent it...

i blame all of this on gwenyth... she made yoga hip again... why did she have to do the same for child birth....

my point

every other female seems to be pregnant at my place of work....

strep throat is also going around, is there a connection???

do we really need to add to the world's population...

I personally won't be.

me breeding is probably not a smart thing to do...

with my luck, I would give birth to the anti-christ....

if chastity belts were still in style, mine would be covered in thorns!

Awesome Master Cleanse Video blog

2007-03-09T23:28:00.000-05:00

I am doing my third master cleanse detox in April. This time I am going to try to do 20 days. I am starting to pump myself up for it and decided to google other blogs that have posted about it. This one is brilliant. I wish I had a webcam. I may invest in one as I think it is a clever idea to do a video blog for the next one. Who knows, we will see. In the meantime check this out!

http://www.mickipedia.com/?p=541

What Firefly Character are you?

2007-03-09T21:21:00.001-05:00

Your results:
You are Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)

Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)		85%
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)		80%
River (Stowaway)		80%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)		80%
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)		70%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)		60%
Wash (Ship Pilot)		55%
Inara Serra (Companion)		40%
Alliance		30%
A Reaver (Cannibal)		20%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)		20%

You are good at fixing things.
You are usually cheerful.
You appreciate being treated
with delicacy and specialness.

Click here to take the Serenity Personality Quiz

the lucky penny and my new hero

2007-03-09T21:11:00.000-05:00

Today Deb gave me a lucky penny. The penny is indeed lucky! I've been having the week from hell, including computer problems again. I had to take my beloved iBook to the shop and have been stressing about it ever since. Before I went to pick it up was when Deb gave me the penny.

I was expecting worst case senario when I went to pick up my computer, instead I was given some of the best news I had heard in three days. Not only was the problem fixed but was fixed with out having to reformat my computer. For that Glen of Northstar Computers is my new hero.

I am about to put that lucky penny to work and am going to get all it's worth out of it. I need luck right now. Trust me.

contest

2007-03-07T11:09:00.000-05:00

need I say more...

go now!

Book News from one of our writers

2007-03-04T16:23:00.000-05:00

Check this book by Karoline Blaha-Black! She is one of our writers.

The book is called "Anika and the Magic Top" and it is a fantasy story for middle grade girls (7-12 years old). The book costs $12.00 and is available for purchase online at www.lulu.com, from myself, and will be also available in the Denton (Texas) Hastings next month in the "Local Authors" section.

Twelve-year-old Anika finds a magical spinning top in her mothers garden. Upon spinning it, it transports her to a land called Animalia. It is a magical land where only animals live, and it is ruled by an evil opossum king called Zarr. Zarr steals the top, Anikas only way of return to Earth, but Anika and her friends figure out a desperate plan. They manage to trick Zarr, and Anika banishes him with the help of the top to an unknown land, so he cant tyranize Animalia anymore. Victorious, she returns to Earth with a special gift from the Animalians and rejoins her family.

let's play this game again :)

2007-02-21T14:50:00.000-05:00

are you compatible with me???

I want everyone who reads this to tell me what score you get :)

What's the big deal???

2007-02-19T15:50:00.001-05:00

Everyone is going on and on about Britney shaving her head and getting new tattoes... so what....

I've shaved my head before, just because I felt like it, I've wanted to it again many times since. Shaving your head is liberating, and you get rid of all the negative energy that has placed itself there. Britney did it... so what....

And lots of people get tattoes, all the time... it's art people and it's personal, so what ...

those of you going on about it, shouldn't you be more concerned about Karla Homolka having a baby, or the fact that there are still women that Robert Picton killed, still missing, or that there are peophiles on our streets and that women are being abuse all the time...

who cares if Britney shaved her head!

New zines!!!

2007-02-15T21:16:00.000-05:00

Go to right now to Shebytches.com and buy our new zines!!!!

Bytch'n in the kitchen is all about kitchen stories and recipes. All bytchy and yummy goodness.

Killer Vegan Waffles is a cooking zine from yours truly all about my obsession. Waffles!!!! There are recipes for breakfast waffles, savoury waffle, sauces and chutneys, not to mention killer tips and idea's. Buy one, make waffles. Yummy!

you suck!

2007-02-15T12:57:00.000-05:00

you suck! I doubt you will read this, you probably don't read blogs, you don't seem the type. when I get an opportunity I will tell you to your face. i don't think you realize you suck, you are too selfish and caught up in your own world to know.

you aren't the only one who sucks. there are many more and I feel they need to know too

to the woman on the subway this morning, who could not control her two year old, letting him flail around like a maniac kicking and hitting any one who was near. you suck.

to the people who couldn't be bothered to shovel the snow from the front of their sidewalks. you suck

to the person who decided to start their snowblower up at 4 am this morning. you suck

to the woman who keeps making the catty comments about my weightloss. get over yourself. you suck

to every man who didn't treat their partner extra special yesterday. you all suck!!!

some points I would like to make...

2007-02-10T10:36:00.000-05:00

This last week has been frustrating to me. I seem to be repeating the same things over and over again to people or... the SAME people, so i am doing a little card with this blog address and when I hear the same questions again next week I will direct them here.... yes, there is anger and frustration in my tone... sigh

I am not sick! I'm doing this on purpose. I have been working hard to lose weight since August. This weight didn't fall off over night!!! I'm also NOT starving myself. There is nothing wrong with having a lunch that consists of a large bowl of veggies and hummus!

I will never be a size 6!!!! EVER!!!! Women aren't suppose to have perfectly flat stomachs, a hard ass or arms like a man. We are suppose to have curves and I adore mine!

I am vegan. No I do not eat cheese and yes YOGURT IS DAIRY. No I do not eat cheese and yes YOGURT IS DAIRY. No I do not eat cheese and yes YOGURT IS DAIRY. I thought if I said it three times and clicked my heels together it would finally sink in to the brain of the person that has asked me 4 times this week if I wanted some cheese or yogurt.

Excuse me, I'm trying to get by. The voice in my head is really saying, 'MOVE OUT OF THE WAY YOU FUCKING RETARD!!! Are all teenagers deaf and must they carry hiking packs everywhere they go and NOT remove them on crowded buses!!!!!!

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

an inconvenient truth

2007-02-09T23:01:00.000-05:00

I just watched a movie called an inconvenient truth. RENT this documentary now!!! It was eye opening. Everyone needs to watch it, then make your children watch it, insist that schools show this movie to their students, tell everyone you know to watch it. We need to snowball Al Gores message and get it out there. I try my hardest to help the envroment, I recycle, don't litter, us enviromentally friendly products, packaging etc. I use public transit or walk where ever I can. But after watching this, I realized I am not doing enough and that will change as of this second.

Earth is our home and if we don't stop the way we are treating it right now, it will evict us!

Just look around you. Look at all the polution, the extreme weather, the vanishing forests, lakes and species. Over population, drought and famine. You think that is all happening on it's own. Think again, we are causing all of these problems and we are the only solution to stop it from getting worse!

Mother Earth is angry and she is fighting back and trust me, she will win.

today...

2007-02-09T13:12:00.000-05:00

saddened about the death of anna nicole smith, when her son died the media should have left her alone

angry by the news that karla homolka is married and just gave birth to a baby boy

confused why a woman would feed her 1 year old cheetos' to shut him up

flattered by all the compliments I got today about my weight loss

intrigued by a book called 'Green for Life'

in love with these vegan blogs, I check them every day

megan the vegan
vegan lunch cast (ken's my new hero)
sarah kramer

Canadian Food Guide

2007-02-07T14:44:00.000-05:00

It's a sad, sad world we live in when it take a countries government 15 years to publish a revised Food Guide. That's right the Canadian Food Guide hasn't been updated in 15 years. The new version came out yesterday. Did you also know it took 4 years for them to do the updating?

4 YEARS? No wonder Canadians are becoming obese at an alarming rate. Heart disease and cancer are at all time highs.... Children are being raised on junkfood instead of fruits and vegetables. It's no wonder our farmers are giving up and closing down.

Trust me there is a more indepth rant coming for this weeks issue of Shebytches.com

In the meantime here is a link to the updated Food Guide.

We created a new holiday!

2007-02-04T18:58:00.000-05:00

And there are new issues live at shebytches.com and lipstikindie.com and new pictures and recipes at voluptuousvegans.wordpress.com.

we've been busy!

Brains... Brains....

2007-02-03T16:02:00.001-05:00

Last night I subjected myself to what was probably the worst zombie movie every. Wait, yes, it was the worst. It was corny, one of the female stars was naked for the entire movie, the special effects for 1985 where much more advanced than this. The FX people should be ashamed of themselves... Right the title. Return of the Living Dead.... bleech. So, that inspired me to put together a list for you...

Best Zombie Movie - In my books that is 28 Days later. Not surprisingly a british made master piece that makes me proud.

Worst Zombie Movie - As mentioned above Return of the Living Dead

Funniest Zombie Movie - Shaun of the Dead. I had to watch this movie three times because, the first time I had to keep explaining British Speak to the people watching with me (annoying), the second was peeing myself while laughing, the third time to actually see what was really going on. And the zombie parts were good too!

First Zombie Movie - The first known Zombie movie was released August 4, 1932 and was called White Zombie. I have it on video and the quality isn't so great, apparently the DVD version has been remastered and is much easier to watch. Me thinks I need a trip to the DVD store.

Biggest Franchise - Living Dead... though I don't think George Romero is making a huge profit from all of them....

Best Trend to come out of Zombie movies - Zombie Walks, I so want to do it next year!!!

Sexy Vegetables

2007-02-02T19:48:00.000-05:00

Ok, this made me hot and hungry

Watch more videos at PETA.org

Help the animals... sign up for the Peta newsletter!

Happy Robbie Burns Day

2007-01-25T10:19:00.000-05:00

Vegan Haggis… but I still refuse to eat it! I got this from Veg World

This recipe can be prepared in advance, ready to bake before serving. The quantities are for four people, but don't worry if the servings look small - the dish is very filling.
• ½ cup (3 oz, 75 g) fine oatmeal (the pinhead variety works best)
• 2/3 cup (4 oz, 110g) of brown or green lentils
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 1 tbsp. vegetable oil
• 2 large carrots, finely grated
• 4 to 6 mushrooms, sliced
• 1 tsp. ground spices (your choice of cumin, turmeric, paprika or nutmeg, in any combination)
• 1 tbsp. soy sauce
• One 14-oz (400 g) can of kidney beans, drained and rinsed
• 2 cloves of garlic, finely minced
• Salt and pepper to taste
• Knob of dairy-free margarine
Oven: Pre-heat to 375F (190C)
Put the oatmeal in a bowl and cover with water. Let it stand for at least an hour. Drain thoroughly.
Place the lentils in a pan of water and boil rapidly for 20 - 30 minutes or until soft (the time will vary according to the type of lentils). When the lentils are ready, drain and rinse them in a sieve.
Sautée the onion in the oil until it is soft. Add the carrots and mushrooms, and cook for a little longer. Then add the spices, soy sauce, cooked lentils and about a quarter of the kidney beans.
Using a food processor or blender, purée the remainder of the beans to form a thick paste (add a little water if necessary to prevent it getting too stiff). Add this to the lentil and vegetable mixture.
Finally, add the drained oatmeal, salt and pepper, and the garlic. If the mixture looks too dry, add the margarine. Mix well.
Transfer to an oven-proof dish and bake for 30 to 40 minutes.

Hello Grade 9

2007-01-24T16:12:00.001-05:00

Why is it that all the people around me, seem like they are still living in grade nine??? I've taken a hard, long look at them and most are in their 30's, good jobs, dress like adults, yet, act like grade niners.

~They gossip

~They ignore you when you ask a question

~They talk about things that I would think kids in grade nine would talk about, such as video games, or TV shows meant for teenagers.

~They judge you by what you are wearing

~They have meaningless conversations... blah blah blah

I would like to escape from this never ending grade nine nightmare. I expecting to start running down a highschool hallway, past the lockers, naked and never able to get to the door at the end. You know that dream, the one where everyone is pointing and laughing. I'm sure it will happen, these people are all around me!

Where did the weekend go?

2007-01-21T17:59:00.000-05:00

It was a busy one. New issue is live a shebytches.com, I entered a 24 hour short story contest. Fingers crossed I win! I also did alot of cooking! I cooked:

slow cooker chana masala
magical meatloaf.. recipe is a few entries below
mash potatoes and mushroom gravy
faux beef stew
coffee cake
brownies

all vegan, all yummy... I would take pictures but my camera is shit. I need to buy a new one!!!!!

needless to say I have tonnes of food for the week. of course tomorrow I'm fasting and every monday going forward.

Zine Makers and Beguiling Toronto

2007-01-19T21:32:00.000-05:00

Zine Makers
Lipstik Reviews (lipstikindie.com) is about to produces it's next slew of podcasts and reviews. We are putting a call out to zine makers. If you want to be reviewed for the website and podcast emails me now. indiereviews@shebytches.com

Beguiling Toronto
Are you a cool, hip, independent, beguiling business, restaurant or hot spot in Toronto? If you are we want to review you for and upcoming podcast!

email us at indiereviews@shebytches.com

cheers!

New Recipes posted at V V

2007-01-18T10:13:00.000-05:00

We have new recipes posted at Voluptuous Vegans.

A day too long...

2007-01-16T09:46:00.000-05:00

Today is the first official day off the fast. It's the day of orange juice! I am however wondering if I went a day too long. By mid afternoon yesterday the lemonade was upsetting my stomach, but the time I drank the last glass it was worse. My body was definetly telling me I was done.

I am so looking forward to tomorrow when I get to eat fruit and soup!!!

I'm done!

2007-01-15T13:05:00.000-05:00

Today is going to be the last day of my fast. My body is telling me it's done, so, I'm done! Tomorrow is orange juice all day. Then the next two days are lemonade in the am, seeds and fruit for lunch, veggie soup for dinner. After that I will follow a similar diet but will not eat soup every night, will have a nice healthy meal.

Day 14 What is that I'm seeing.

2007-01-15T11:22:00.000-05:00

Is it the light at the end of the tunnel?

Tomorrow will officially be the last day of the fast. I could probably stop today, but said 15 days so will do one more. My body has told me it's done, so it's done. My tongue is pink again, and I haven't lost any more weight for two days, so those are the signs I am doneskys!!!

I will be glad to taste something other than lemonade and tea. I am massively craving spicey foods and am obsessing about food!!!

New issue of shebytches.com

2007-01-14T14:19:00.001-05:00

It's live and ready for you to read!!!

Magical Meatloaf

2007-01-14T14:16:00.000-05:00

Ok, I haven’t actually tried this yet. I made the recipe using the Magical Meatloaf generator at the Vegan Lunchbox Blog. Jennifer is brilliant by the way :)

Once I am done the fast, this is the first thing I am cooking. Please go ahead and try it in the meantime and let me know what happens.

Magical Meatloaf

Ingredients:
1/2 cup walnuts
2 TB canola oil
One onion, diced
One large garlic clove, minced
Two celery ribs, diced
One cup mushrooms, cleaned and chopped
2 cups vegetarian burger or sausage crumbles
1 cup dry whole wheat bread crumbs
1/4 to 1/2 cup vegetable broth, as needed
1/2 cup uncooked polenta
1 tsp. dried basil
1/4 tsp. dried oregano
1/4 tsp. dried rosemary
1 tsp. ground cumin
Several dashes vegetarian Worcestershire Sauce
2 TB soy sauce
1 can tomato sauce

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 350º. Spray a loaf pan or 8x8 square baking pan with nonstick spray and set aside (an 8x8 pan makes a crisper loaf).

Grind the walnuts into a coarse meal using a food processor or spice/coffee grinder. Place in a large mixing bowl and set aside.

Sauté any vegetables you've chosen in the vegetable oil until soft. Add to the large mixing bowl along with all the remaining ingredients. Mix and mash together well, adding only as much liquid as needed to create a soft, moist loaf that holds together and is not runny (you may not need to add any liquid if the grains and protein are very moist). Add more binder/carbohydrate as needed if the loaf seems too wet.
Press mixture into the prepared pan and bake for 45 minutes to 1 hour, or until cooked through. Add the tomato sauce to the top of the loaf during the last 10 minutes.

Let the loaf cool in the pan for 10 to 15 minutes, then turn out onto a plate or platter and slice. Serve with potatoes, vegetables, and vegetarian gravy, if desired.
Cold leftover slices of make a great sandwich filling.

Lucky #13

2007-01-14T10:29:00.000-05:00

13 has always been a lucky number for me. Why people think it is unlucky I will never understand. Today is day 13. Once I get through today, 2 more days of fasting and three to come off. I am soooo looking forward to Wednesday morning when I can finally sip orange juice!

I am keeping myself preoccupied with getting my work caught up. Yesterday I finished designing all the new 1" buttons for Shebytches.com and finished off zines. I just need to print them, take one final look and off to the printer they go. Then I have the next one to put together. Today I am writing all day. Being at home and near the fridge makes it hard. Every time I open the fridge to get water or my lemonade I am faced with all the food that staring back at me begging to eaten. I usually tell it to 'Fuck Off' and then shut the door.

Some how I have gotten it in my head that the first thing I am going to cook when I can finally eat regular food again is Vegan Meatless Loaf. There is a yummy looking recipe in La Dolce Vegan by Sarah Kramer, so, me thinks that is the one I will be making! The God's know I have worn out all three of her cookbooks in the last week, fantasying about what recipes I will make when the fast is over!

Day 12 Slow but sure...

2007-01-13T10:40:00.000-05:00

It's day 12 and I am officially at the point of is it day 15 yet? I was ok up until about late yesterday afternoon. I LOVE the lemonade, but am getting bored with it. Really bored. I have been reading through my cookbooks and stating 'when I'm done the fast... I'm going to make that and that and that...' so that's not helping. I am just hoping the white coating is gone on my tongue by day 15. It's still there, though it does seem a bit less today.

I've also just discovered that you can download a pdf of the master cleanse book. In a way I wish I had know that from the first cleanse, but am a book whore and would have bought it anyway, but for those of you wanting to do the cleanse and having a hard time getting the book, print off the pdf.

I'm also back on the Senna tea for the weekend. Man does that stuff work...

~Tips to succeed at a fast/cleanse (my tips anyway):
~Prepare yourself mentally ahead of time. For a week or more before pump yourself up.
~Prepare your fridge. Make sure you eat up all the food that will go bad and don't have anything in your fridge that will tempt you to eat. Though condiments do look mighty tasty when you are hungry.
~Have your ingredients ready the day before. Make sure you always have enough for a few days at a time. This saves less trips to the grocery store. You need, lemons, grade 3 organic maple syrup, cayenne pepper, water, senna tea and peppermint tea (to aid upset tummy)
~Only do it if you know you can do it for 10 days straight. If you have a dinner or wedding or function to attend half way through, don't do the cleanse.
~Follow the three days of coming off instructions. Don't go nuts and start gorging yourself on food right away. Your stomach will revolt!

If I think of any more I will add them :)

Whoo hoo Day 11

2007-01-12T10:28:00.001-05:00

I'm officially past the 10 day mark. If I do only end up doing 15 days that means 4 and half more to do. I feel great. My skin is glowing. I'm losing inches. I feel light and healthy! The only complaint is the constant gross film that is on my teeth. No matter how much I brush I can't seem to get rid of it!

I'm also afraid I will have to start drinking the Senna again over the weekend. No BM's since Wednesday. I'm assuming because there just isn't anything in there but... the book says you should still have movements ever day. Which I don't get but...

Check out this thread at the theppk.com. It's about the cleanse http://www.postpunkkitchen.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=16356&p=1. You should should check out theppk.com anyway and buy their cookbooks!

Too cool for words......

2007-01-11T11:38:00.000-05:00

Apple is taking over the world it seems and I am glad. The new iPhone is their latest gadget and it is uber cool! I want one!

This is also out of the world. Google Earth has released a new version. Check it out!

Day 10 This Lemonade's becoming famous.

2007-01-11T10:05:00.000-05:00

The lemonade recipe is becoming very popular it seems. Not as a cleanse/fast but as a drink. I've now read, in several magazines, it's health benefits (huge kick of Vit C for starters). Especially for this time of year. Again I saw a blurb about it this morning, this time in Eye magazine.

I can understand it's poplularity. It's tasty, the ingredients are very basic and it's easy to make. As a matter of fact I'm going to share the recipe with you now:

2 TBSPs fresh squeezed lemon juice (organic preferred but not necessary)
2 TBSPs Pure Maple Syrup (Grade #3, you can buy it at Big Carrot and most heath food markets)
pinch of cayenne

You can serve it cold, room temp or hot. Hot is nice is you need something soothing.

Drink up!

In other news....

Starbucks is now supporting vegans.... in a small way. They are introducing Vegan brownies!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 9 Here I come

2007-01-10T11:01:00.001-05:00

I'm more than half way! 9 down, 6? to go (plus 3 days to come off). Though once in a while I get a urge to eat food, seeing and smelling it actually repulses me. So does many peoples body order. The longer into the fast I go the more sensitive to smell I become. Having to take the subway every single day isn't helping!

I've also been doing alot of reading on juice fasting. Most of the authors fast. I'm not surprised. They do regular lengthy fasts a few times a year, plus they do a one day fast every single week. They have food for 6 days, juice fast for one. The reason they do this is to not lose the benefits of the longer fasts. Fasting once a week helps the body to continue detoxing. Once the fast is done, I am also going to start practicing this. I think I might do it on Monday's. It's a great way to start the week off.

Day 8 Half way?

2007-01-09T12:39:00.001-05:00

It's day 8, if I choose to do only 15 days, this means I am half way there. Well... of the fast part anyway. I will still have three days to come off the fast after that. Overall I am feeling really good. Am tired this morning, but that is because I had another night of fitful sleep and bizarre dreams.

The dreams get weirder to. I had one where I was tasting food and then spitting it out, because I wasn't allowed to eat anything, but desperately wanted to taste food. Crazy, Crazy, but am not surprised.

The last few nights I have also been going through all my vegan cookbooks marking all the new stuff I am going to be trying out. I promised myself last fast that I will try new things all the time and not eat the same things over and over again. Life is too short!

Day 7 Sweet Lemonade!

2007-01-08T10:56:00.000-05:00

I'm now at the point in the fast where I start to enjoy it. Last night I had a better sleep and woke up energized, which is a bit odd for a Monday morning. I am also starting to see a physical difference. I've lost 1.5 inches so far, my skin is starting to glow and over all am feeling good.

I know I still have a long ways to go, but am no longer counting down to the end. I know there isn't a specific end, whether it be 15 or 20 days, I will just know when the time is right.

Day 6 Hello, Hello, Hello, is there anybody out there, out there, out there

2007-01-07T14:36:00.000-05:00

It's day six and my stomach feels hollow. It surprises me that there is still anything in there, but apparently there is. I've decided to lay off the Senna, I can't chance an upset stomach tomorrow, being Monday and I have to take the subway... with my luck there will be a delay or something.

Otherwise, feel strong and in over all great mood. My cough is GONE. I again thank the super doses of Vit C from the lemons.

I just wish I could stop dreaming about food and craving it. Last night I dreamt I cooked a huge feast. Then the cravings (yes these are all vegan):

Poutine
Club Sandwich
Pizza
Salt and Vinegar Chips
tacos

That is making me nuts. As well each time I open the fridge to get my lemonade I am tortured by all the food that is in there!

Tomorrow is day 7... almost half way!

1930's movie obsession

2007-01-07T14:32:00.000-05:00

I'm obsessed with the 1930's. You can see just how much by reading this.

Lately I've been watching tonnes of movies from the 1930's on TMC. The most amazing I've seen in the last few days were Jezebelle, 42nd St and White Banners. I so love that era!

New issue @ Shebytches.com

2007-01-07T14:29:00.000-05:00

The new issue is LIVE!!! Live I tell you. Also check out our new 1" buttons.

New Bank at www.lipstikindie.com

New Buttons at shebytches.com

Day 5 Senna cleaner upper

2007-01-06T13:25:00.000-05:00

It's day 5 and I am now 1/3 of the way through. I feel pretty good, other than the gurgling tummy. That is part there is nothing in there and part the Senna Tea I am using. I used it last time as well and I will tell you. It works almost too well! It's from Celebration Herbals. I've also had their peppermint tea and so far it is the yummiest. I have a picture on the left. It isn't of the Senna Tea but it will give you an idea of what the box looks like incase you are looking for a good Laxative tea. I will warn you though, if you need to go somewhere and won't be near a washroom for a long period of time. Don't drink it. It starts working after 2-4 hours. At least it does for me.

I haven't tried the lemonade hot yet, but will this evening. Viki say's it's super yummy!

Get Reviewed by us!

2007-01-06T11:07:00.001-05:00

LipStik Indie Reviews is accepting Music CD’s, Bands/Artists/Spoken Word Performances/launches, Movie, Books, Comic Books, Graphic Novels, Zine and Ezines for review. We understand how difficult it is to get started as Indie Artists. We’ve all been in your shoes and know it is much more important for the world to know about you.

If you are interested in submitting to us message us here or email us at indiereviews@shebytches.com or go to lipstikindie.com and click on the submit link!

Day 4 Gurgle Gurgle

2007-01-05T10:25:00.000-05:00

My stomach won't stop gurgling and it now has that familar hollow feeling. This is the same as the last time. Day four all the weird noises start. Day 4 the weight or shall I say fat starts to melt away as well. When I measured myself this morning I lost an inch off my waist and belly.

I am finding with this round that I have less energy. The factor to that is I was ill with the flu right before starting the fast. Hopefully that will change soon! I am also going to start yoga again tonight. I've been too exhausted to do it the last few days.

I also read last night that having nightmare in the first part of a fast is normal. That would explain all the bizarre dreams!!!!!!

It's all downhill on skiis from here :)

Day 3 Over the hump day

2007-01-04T10:28:00.000-05:00

It's day 3 today. It seemed last time that once I got past day three things were peachy. I am guessing it takes at least that long for your body to get use to the liquid diet and to stop being hungry. I also noticed last time that it was after day 3 that I also started to lose weight. Seems to be the same right now. I have measured myself each morning and no change yet.

As with last time I am very sensitive to smell. The man beside me on the subway reeked of garlic. The car was packed and I couldn't move.... yuck!

My cough seems to be going away as well. I am sure it is from the mega dose of Vit C I am getting from the lemons.

Again last night with the bizarre dreams... not sure if it's the fast or the full moon.

I am also craving tonnes of things:

salt and vinegar chips
toast and jam
baked beans
club house sandwich??? though now I am going to create a recipe for a vegan one.

Day 2 Stop Annoying me!

2007-01-03T09:55:00.000-05:00

Grrrrrrrrrrr am very cranky this morning. I didn't sleep well at all last night due to getting up several times to pee and bizarre dreams. I had bizarre dreams last fast but for some reason thought they were later on.

To top it all of people are really annoying me this morning. Between bumping into me and torturing me with their coffee smells and bad body odour! Take a bloody shower or use some deodorant!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At least I didn't wake up hungry. Just cranky!

Day 1 Phase 2 of the Cleanse

2007-01-02T10:17:00.000-05:00

It's been three months since the first Cleanse. It's a new year and a second cleanse. Today is day 1. Oddly I woke up craving toast and jam and right this very second am very hungry. That's not normal for me. I have to say it is psycological!!! and nothing else. Once I get past day 3 it is smooth sailing... and at this point day 3 seems light years away!

Viki and Janis started yesterday, so they are already on Day 2. As with the last cleanse I will keep you updated.

12:41 the smell of other peoples lunches is making me crazy!!!!!!!!!!!

At least I'm not having caffiene withdrawal this time.... That was the worst of it last time.

Time for another peppermint tea

2:33 pm am on my third glass of lemonade.. trying to kill the hunger pangs. I intend on doing this fast till my tongue is pink... last time I did the fast I stopped at 10 days and probably should have kept going. I am in for the long haul whether it's 10 days, 15 or 20 days. If I'm not going to do it right, there is no point in doing it.

Other than the hunger I feel fine. No headaches.. yeah, but am quite thirsty.

I am also going to work out everyday with the fast, last time I only worked out a few days a week.

2007 is finally here!!!!!

2007-01-01T10:45:00.000-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

Wishing everyone all the best in 2007!!!!

xo c

Death of Cool Scarves

2006-12-31T11:53:00.000-05:00

Check out my girl Monica's uber cool scarves!!!!!! You can find them here!

Lipstik Indie is LIVE!

2006-12-30T18:00:00.000-05:00

We have officially launched! What is LipStik Indie Reviews all about? LipStik Indie Reviews is all about Indie Artists. If you are a singer, band, spoken word artist, comic book creator, writer (from zines to novels), have an ezine or online DIY store, you should be reviewed by us. We’ve all been in your shoes and know it is important for the world to know about you. Check out our submissions guidelines @ www.lipstikindie.com, if you want us to review you.

Count down to fast part deux

2006-12-29T14:19:00.000-05:00

on january 2, 2007 viki and I will be commencing on our second fast. janis will be joining us a few days later.

it's funny, i wasn't looking forward to xmas (acually hate it) but am very excited about fasting again. unless you try it you have no idea how good it makes you feel. hopefully it will also purge me of this cough!!!!!

The Rayna Podcast

2006-12-28T21:44:00.000-05:00

The Rayna Podcast is LIVE! And you can find it here!

This girl is one hot commodity and will be singing at a venue near you. Check out her websites here.

Rayna.ca
Rayna's Myspace

Sponsors:
Lizzie Violet
2-Mile

The week that officially sucked!

2006-12-22T10:56:00.000-05:00

Ok, this has been a crap week!!! Around noon on Monday I started to get a tickle in my throat... by the time I got home from work my throat was on fire, I was coughing and I had a slight temperature... Tuesday I woke up feeling like hell, but had to go to work... it was the week before vacation... coughing, slight fever, headache... When I got home it had gotten worse... Wednesday... same thing but with a 103 fever... still went to work... may as well infect everyone... misery loves company... Thursday.. I prayed I would be better. It is Solstice and I needed to go the Festival of Lights. Not happening.. still have a 103 fever, haven't slept in two days due to the coughing and have lost my voice. Like the fool I am still went to work...

Today it's friday. I am working at home, and need to get caught up... I still feel like poo

I guess that is my early Xmas present from the Flu Gods... Geez thx!

At least 2006 is almost over!!!!

New Podcast is live

2006-12-17T19:39:00.001-05:00

And you will find it HERE!!!!!

I get it already

2006-12-12T21:28:00.000-05:00

Ok Lady, I get it, I'm hearing your message LOUD AND CLEAR! I'm getting off the fence!

On a not so separate note.

Anna you are a true sister and my sister, because we do get to choose our family and I LOVE YOU!!!!!

a quote we should all live by...

2006-12-10T20:21:00.000-05:00

“One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it. But to sacrifice what you are and to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.” Joan of Arc

A must

2006-12-07T13:34:00.000-05:00

Go check out Sarah Kramer's blog right now! She has the best song posted there. Ok, I just sounded like someone in grade nine!

New issue and NEW PODCAST

2006-12-03T21:22:00.000-05:00

There is a new issue up at shebytches.com with Guest Bytch interview with Sarah Kramer!

That's right, our Guest Bytch for this issue is Sarah Kramer. Check out our interview with her.

You can see that and all the weekly articles at

www.shebytches.com

go check it out now!

We also have a new podcast live. Vegan Bytches That Rule the World. As well it includes part 2 of the Sean Ward Interview. Download it from here!

how fast can you be???

2006-11-29T14:01:00.000-05:00

since I am feeling all happy happy

the first 10 people to email me.... get a button pack of the latest greatest 1" shebytches buttons... (these babies aren't even on the website yet)

The sad, sad story of my iBook

2006-11-29T13:59:00.000-05:00

Last Wednesday night I came home ready to write. Bleed out the words that were filling up the space in my head. Desperate to share. I as per usual went down to my office, flipped open the lid of my trusty iBook.. and nothing. At first I thought I had turned it off the evening before, rather than put it to sleep. I checked and the little button that flashes when your computer is sleeping was... flashing. So I tried again. Nothing.

I hard shut it down, pray to the computer gods to let it work. Again nothing, but I could faintly see the desktop image in the back ground. I tried adjusting the brightness, nothing. I sat with head in hands trying to remember what I did the night before. It seems I did nothing out of the ordinary, nothing unusual. What the hell is going on.

Flash: I'm the girl who buys the shelf, that's missing the screw to hold it up. If one out of a million iBooks had a faulty screen, I would be the one who bought it. If I try to set up an appointment with someone, the time they are free I'm not. If I need a size 8.5, it's the only one sold out. That's just how the cookie crumbles with me and yes I usually end up with the bag of cookies that are crumbled.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, it's just how is goes.

When I dropped off my computer, I begged and pleaded to have it back by Monday, I also begged and pleaded that they try not to lose my files as it had been over three months since I backed them up. Again... me.. cookie...

Can't have your computer till next Wed/Thurs
Don't worry about your files, it's just the monitor
Is it still under warranty???

I can handle point one, I needed the break
Point two, whew
Point three... eeeeeeeeeeee

My chest tightened up... before I could speak I asked when I bought it, I said Feb. The guy said you should be ok, and checked in my computer. But, but... the guy I bought it from told me 3 month warranty

Well, either I wasn't listening or the 18 year old who sold it to me was stoned. It's 1 year parts and labour, 3 months software. I was so relieved I did the happy dance.

Until I called today to see when I could get my iBook back. 'Um.... they are still testing it... not for a few more days.'

I almost cried. I can't take two more days, I am so far behind on my writing, zines and website... two more days.

An hour later I got another call. Your iBook is ready for pick up. Part two of the happy dance and guess who is buying the extended two year warranty! That's right me! Not to mention I will NEVER go three months again without backing up my files.

So... back to it tonight... and guess who won't be leaving her office for the entire weekend... again if you guessed me, you win!

xo c

Open letter to those who are making me crazy...

2006-11-28T19:54:00.000-05:00

Below is an open letter to those who are making me crazy. Either it is because I can no longer tolerate you or have become frustrated by your actions. Please read!

--

Dear (insert your name here),

I'm normally a very tolerant person. Or at least I try to be. Lately though my patience has grown thin and my tolerance of many is growing weary. I ask only a simple list of things from all of you. The things on this list are pretty standard and easy to follow. Out of respect for my sanity I ask that you read the list, memorize it and fulfill it.

List:
~If you want to talk to me, talk to me and don't stare waiting for me to take the lead on a conversation. I don't bite. Ok, I do but have been asked to stop.
~Look at me when I talk to you.
~When I email you respond to me... same day. No one is really that busy.
~Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you.
~Don't mumble when you talk
~Don't nag at me
~Don't ask me a question I can't answer and then after I say I can't answer it ask me again.
~Don't make me repeat myself, 50 times
~Don't ask me the same question over and over again
~Don't talk down to me
~DON'T make any kind of chauvinistic remarks around me... I do bite (see above)

As you can see these are really easy rules to follow. Do yourself a favour and start following them. If not, I won't tolerate you any longer. And trust me that list is getting pretty long.

Yours Truly
The bytchy one